Tonight I went to my 6th BCM Senior Banquet/Send Off. Yep 6th. Wow time flies! This was my first time being there and not being a student or staff member. Instead, I was just a guest.
This has been such an interesting year for me. A year ago, I was just beginning to "phase out" of the BCM. The ministry had been my life for 8 years. I was both excited and sad. The students and new staff were beginning their plans for the next year, which is always an exciting time. I was beginning my search for a new career, which typically is not an exciting time!
Since then I have gone through 5 months of unemployment and 7 months of a new job. It has been quite the adjustment. I have learned so much about myself in the last year. It has been the hardest year for me Spiritually but probably the best as well. I went from full time ministry in my own job and ministering with my husband at church, to a full time office job and still ministering at church. I have had to adjust to a very set 8-4:30 Monday-Friday schedule. I have had to learn to make time to prepare for dgroup amidst my job, cooking & cleaning, family time, and youth ministry. I can no longer do this as part of my job, and that was a new thing for me.
My health has improved drastically, and I have more energy than I've had in years. We are no longer stressing over health insurance. My husband was able to quit working 80 hours a week to provide for us. I am home at night and able to have quality time with him. I have realized the world can revolved without me (I mean I never sat around and really thought I was mrs.everything, but I was used to be the person everyone depended on way too much). The Lord has shown me that I am not special and He can (and will) use anyone to do His ministry. And He has graciously shown me that though I am not special and He can use anyone, He chooses to love me unconditionally and desires to use me despite my failings. He is a good God.
A year from now I am sure I will be looking back to today having the same thought- wow time flies. Wow things change. I think thats why God created a universe that has orbiting planets and made the Earth spin... to show us life constantly goes. But He, and He alone, never changes. "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever." Hebrews 13:8.
At least something in my life is stable, right?!