I have a confession... A few actually.
1. Remember how I was working on memorizing Phillipians? Well, I haven't worked on it since July. And from February to July I only memorized chapter one. Yep, I am no good at this!
2. Remember how I was doing that 90 day challenge? Well I haven't worked on it in almost a week.
Now that I got those things off of my chest, let me get to the point. I am slacking! But I have been looking at my Spiritual life this last week and just asking myself 'what am I doing to seek God daily?' And I have realized something.
I overspiritualize things. Sometimes I take a perfectly fine thing and make it 'the thing that will grow my faith'. I did this with the 90 day challenge. I determined that because I would be reading such a big chunk of scripture each day that I would just automatically be able to see the beauty of how it all fits together and Gods big plan. And that could definitely be one outcome.... It just has not been mine.
I have really struggled with this plan. It's a lot of scripture each day, and it was way too much for me to make sense of during my quiet time each morning. Because I have such a legalistic tendancy, I just kept going into "gotta get it done" mode even when I tried not to. I have made it to 1 kings, but I have decided it is time to change it up.
I am quitting. I know, I am a big fat quitter! And I have actually thought about continuing just so I don't seem like a quitter, yep that's how prideful I am. But right now it's a hinderance to my time with the Lord, not a blessing.
So I am going to be slowing it down and taking things slow for awhile. But in reference to my first confession, I am not going to quit on Phil. The whole reason I started it was because I have always sucked at scripture memory. So I am not letting myself off the hook on that one.
So starting today, the 1st of sept., I am renewing my goal to memorize that whole dang book. And I am straight up quitting my goal to read the bible in 90 days. So should you call me a quitter or a starter??
- Mrs.Pate via my iPhone